Today

a poem by Terry Jones

Today, I died
in front of you.
Yesterday, I cried
holding you
At this hour
I’m alone without you.
Next hour
I’m still alone.
Tomorrow, I’ll be gone
far away from here.
Everything here is wicked,
even the chilly air.
I’m not dead
just totally numb.
I know you don’t aim
to make me feel dumb.
I know you love me, and
you know I love you
but we’re too close
to be that close
and everyone knows it.
I just want to be happy
and with you I’d still be free
to speak my mind
with no fear of pain.
I’m not saying forever
cause I know it’s not true.
Forever takes a long time to reach
eternity does too.
I know how I feel and I
know how you feel too,
but I still feel the same
and don’t know what to do.
I still want to hold you and
I still want it to be the same
but maybe better.
I don’t know how to achieve that
without stepping over the line
and I’m wondering if we could ever
be together at a later time.