Poems by Jita Susan Jacob

I thought

a poem by Jita Susan Jacob

I thought
I could do it alone…
my intelligence
my work
my time
was only necessary to take me along.

I thought that
You were not required…
bcoz
whatever I did
I could see
but
whatever You do,
all Your plans
I can’t see in writing
I just thought
that Your word didn’t count.
Only mine counted.

Now I stand empty handed
all that I had done
has been
wiped away into non existence
before my very eyes
in one wave of Your hand.

All my sweat, my time, my plans
-a mockery by Your one move.

My intelligence, my work
-nothing in the shadow of Your power

How insignificant am I
Nothing at all am I

I realise
that nothing
in my life
is possible
without You willing it.

After all
You are the potter
and I, the clay,
formless and shapeless,
in Your hands…
and unless You didn’t will it
I would have always been like that.

I have paid a heavy price…
but the insight and realisation
I have is priceless
Let me bear this in my mind all thru’ out.
Let me not forget this lesson.

And now
I crawl back
wiping away tears
In Your great mercy
will You forgive me?
In Your hands
I lay my life

Take me Your way
thru’ the valleys and Hills
for
my vision is myopic
my memory so shortlived

Never ever let me forget
how I started out…

Never ever let me
be arrogant of anything I have…

Never ever let me forget
how my life would have been…
if You hadn’t willed it.
if You hadn’t touched it.