Deep from the Heart

a poem by Shonamoni

I asked you,
do you read palms?
Hmm… show me your hand.

Parallel heart and head lines,
hmm… you are practical,
mount of venus says you hold that charm,
and marriages will be two.
When you marry the first, start searching for the next, ho ho ho.

Shona?
Where are you in my hand?
Do you see yourself in my hand?
Tell me, na…

How will I know it? My heart? I am not a palm expert…

We broke up last year.

Today, even though I am still mildly feeling the pain, I forgive you.

There has been no one like you.
I am angry, I am hurt.
But I remember your face at the airport,
and your choked, I love you which was earnest.
I remember.

Your boxer hands, and your porcupine like eyebrows, I remember.
You thought you are not good looking to me.
But you were.

You were like my own child.
Like my own self.
Like the teddy bear that God sent me.
And you thought bad of yourself?
Are you mad?

You may or may not ever read this.
I may or may not get over you.
I may or may not marry again.
But I forgive you.

In return, when you go to sleep, smile a little smile, and sleep.

I have been true.
Remember that.
I never lied on you.
You know that, haina?
Nobody ever was there.
You were that person.
You were the one.

Life is short.
For me.
And for you.
God knows how long each of us will live.
I may die in an accident tomorrow.
Or you may.
In the final analysis, you are God’s child and so am I.
We all are going back to God.
One way or the other.

Nothing in this life is permanent, stationary or real.
Then why not I forgive you and move on nearer to God.
If not for anything else, I forgive you for that airport hug.
And the choked words.
I can read people.
And I feel you were earnest at that point of time.

Everything else is fine here.
May God bless you and treat you with kindness.
God is very big and He/She can take care of everything.
You should start praying.
I have.
My prayers have made me a better person.
I love God.
I used to love you.