It was a tiny lavender blossom
Insignificant among the creme-de-la-creme of floral beauties
Innocently finding its unpopularity, difficult to comprehend;
It longed not to be the cynosure of eyes that passed by
But it wondered why nobody was quixotic enough to like it
When all the buds of the same plant were looked at in awe;
It waited and waited for the soft touch of fingers
The awaited day dawned in glory,
A group of maidens with a penchant for blooms
Crowded the plant like butterflies
Plucked and trampled, admired and shunned-
All but one sylph with a genial, radiant smile, angelic!
She took the flower in her hand, took it to her lips,
Quiver! Pink labial touch!
But while it was still floatin in the heavens- her soft palms,
She left it in the foliage of a bush,
â€œYou look better there, in your homeâ€
Alas! I had better been an atrophy!
Oft, when the breeze flows silently past,
And the dead leaves lying on the cracked ground,
Brush against each other, blowing the purity away;
I walk along the leaf corpses, enshrouded by memories,
Their silent crackling voicing my wordless sorrow,
My yesterday, my tomorrow!
A million voices cry in my mind, all strangled by me,
And only their muffled noise reaches the tearless world,
The graveyard that left me alone!
I had been only the wind yesterday, (ne’er the rose,)
And the flute must have enchanted me.
But, maybe I was no wind, and maybe, there was no flute!
Illusion or not, what cares have I,
While I walk along the beautiful autumnal listeners!!!
As I observe life, I, a detached onlooker,
try to catch myself at the not-so-crucial crossroads
discovering those moments that make life
a worthy opponent, a delightful journey!
Moments that leap out, like commas in a sentence!
While flipping through the pages of a book
waiting for the host,
While nodding to a piece of symphony
with notes that strangle your shy thoughts out,
While looking at the darkening sky
that leaves bright orange traces on your window,
While waking in the early hours of dawn,
silent and uninhabited!
Moments that grip you
clutching your naked soul in all its loneliness,
Moments that hug you in a fatal embrace of joy
choking you with all of life’s happiness,
Moments that catch you unawares
when your unbridled mind is about to leap from one thought to another!
Not the ostentatious instants of triumph
or total despair,
Not instants of fiery inspiration
lascivious passion or exuberant ecstasy,
Not instants of pomp and fame and rush and people,
the so-called full stops of life,
Not the coquettish instants of emotion
that leave you no time to feel,
But calm, silent lonely moments,
too many to list,
too beautiful to describe!
Moments that leap out, like commas in a sentence!
For words murder the thoughts
that arise in solitary peace,
Their corpses lying in solace, buried in the commas!
I’ll never forget the first day I saw you,
when you appeared a wonder
in the small world of mine.
The way you left me awestruck
by the beauty of your overflowing emptiness
and homogeneity with the air outside-
a thin fatal film of separation, like a glass window;
It was a pleasure to watch you foam
And die in a second.
But why is it that today,
not just today, but throughout the aged present,
You don’t enchant me as of old?
Is it because the world itself
is a nine-day wonder?
At times I wish I could go back to you,
Just for a day, or may be two…
Not completely real, but like in a dream,
Soft and inconsequent, but enjoyable…
Not changing the tide of life as I go on,
But just a ripple here, a ripple there,
A mild soothing dawn…
We can never go back to what we were, I’m sure,
Nor start again what has now become sour…
Yet in passing moments,
Lost in loneliness, when time stands still,
I wonder if we could be together,
And not let time, our happiness, kill,
But tomorrow should start with us alone and separate,
Lest the remnant of love in my heart decay into hate…
Love can bloom twice, my friend, but die only once,
And we can savour the memories of the dead,
Not resurrect em…
No, not resurrect ’em…
On a hilly path spiralling down to eternity,
At every turn, a sudden splurge, a sudden upward jolt,
Yet never to recover, Yet nobody’s fault!
Deeper, deeper, deeper down the ravine, as I travel,
Blacker, blacker, blacker becomes the vacuum that consumes me…
Blurred images of a joyful past flash across my mind,
Blotches of colour, against solemn black,
Green lawns, sun-bathed days,
And long legs chasing butterflies…
The present journey may be irrevocable now,
But it was a beautiful past,
Only, like a piece of art, to be left untouched!
And I think,
Where has all the laughter gone? When did I lose it?
As I am absorbed, minute by minute, into this vacuum,
I vanish into nowhere:
Nowhere, the land of emptiness, that is filled by me!
I create the space as I move along
Filling it with bright cheer
But as I move, the vacuum drinks it all!
It shreds my joy like fabric-glimmer
And captures it like mosquito-nets do the sunlight;
Then I comprehend the infinity of this vacuum
That cannot spread its emptiness, or radiate darkness
Or radiate its freezing cold
Yes, I comprehend the sad, sad infinity of this vacuum
I walk free today, fly if you will
Like a dove in the great sky
I stretch the wings of my life and soar
Leaving behind the poison of my past
I frolic in the plush green grass today
Letting it tickle my pink little toes
I take in the beauty that is life
For today is my rebirth, cancer has lost
I celebrate the cleansing of my soul
Dancing under the brilliance of the sun
I have been granted peace under His
Ever loving grace, through my strength
I will strive to walk the path of truth
Give my will to others who suffer as I did
I will pray for the fallen souls,
Each night they will be within my heart
I will savour the fragrance of life forever
Cause have three children taking
In all that I have and rejoice
Love has overcome…
Unable to tell you when I became the wind,
And you the sand-dune
I always wanted it to last forever,
Then the togetherness, now the separation;
But being the wind, one must realize
Nothing flies with you too long
They go sooner, the closer they came along,
May be my life shall never have a love song
All those memories get muddled in my head,
Like sand in a slush, not leaves in a storm!
It is difficult to tell you I’m leaving you behind
And difficult to watch you trying to find
Why it isn’t the same as before
I love you, but not anymore!!
A volcano erupts from the Earth’s umbrella,
Droplets of fire glistening towards the ground
Hundreds of flaming altars springing from the river of tar
And the smoke arises to the echo of thundering mantras
Splashing a supernova offering
As their solar-eyed protector still wavers among the waves,
Selecting a form that would displease no one;
The sparks of her furnace ooze, poisoning villages
And the cries and moans cloud their burnt bruises
Fiery images of unhealed pain flash across my dampened mind
I float in a pot of boiling guilt-
“Why the inequalities? Why the evil?”
The thunder chants again
I only smile, silenced by my one-year-old’s “w-a-tuh!!”
He was born in late summer
A bad-fated, young, green leaf
and when, just one week old, autumn began
His mother, the tree, discarded him
and he opened his eyes, while closing,
-Is sunrise at dusk, possible!?
But the little soul, active, waited-
as the first winter breeze touched him
He danced around,
doubtful, “Why did the other leaves keep quiet?”
He danced and fluttered, but suddenly stopped;
She, the wind, apparently old now,
and this pure soul now kept quiet
Till it passed on to the next leaf in spring.
As I walk in this mosaic of colors
catching the abstract, time and again,
and packing it into letters, words, numbers and equations;
Like a spider, weaving the abstract into beautiful webs
However beautiful, they are cobwebs, you see!
I wonder why I don’t pack it all up
(The more I find, the more there is)
So that life unravels
new dimensions each day
Makes me feel I am entangled in life’s master cocoon
But lo and behold,
I emerge a wise butterfly!
As thin needles of water fall from the sky
As if to sew my tears
Into a garment of grief
I look around to see
If there is just one person to understand my grief
Not pity, not offer empty words of consolation
And hold my hand
Giving me reassurance, comfort, solace
The heartbreak of the sky seems melancholic
Yet not so much out of sorrow
As the inability to share it
And I think, it is not hard to bear a heartbreak
But it is hard to bear it alone
“The moon will go to bed
the sun to work,
Morn will dawn,
the rose shall bloom”
Dreamt the timid bee
of the morning to be.
caught in the closed petals,
the bee dreamt on”
Alas, eaten by the stray cow
ended the rose.
That sad night,
to say finis-in-toto
to lotus, petal, bee and all…