Author Archives: Ajith

The Call

I hear music,
The music of death,
Cries of the dead
And the ones dying.

I wish my life be short,
I would feel happiness
I would hear the music of peace
The one you might never mind.

Darkness the only truth,
Light the cheat
So sad the moans!
Of my live pals.

Did I scare you with my song
Oh! Its only a thought,
Not to worry my dear,
You can still sing your song.

If I could meet you,
I would sing this for you,
But not with a coffee,
But with tears or blood.

To my genie

As I look at these stars
I search for my genie
Who changed my life
Filling it with love

But the pain,
Though I like to hate
As she is invisible
I am falling in love with it

Am I in love with the genie
Or is it the pain I am for
I can only say that
I live for my genie

She puts me in tears
When she remains in her bottle
But she brings smiles to me
When I think of her

She herself is a gift
So how can I ask for more
I have given myself to her
Will she ever know?

Her seconds of silence
Are days for me
As the time clicks
Wish I could stop it

She reminds me often
That I have to wait in rain
To see the rainbow
Just for once

My genie remains invisible
As I wait for my day
To evaporate myself
To blend with her

Unsung song

I wish I could sing that song for you
With the melody of the kuil
Rain drops to add rhythm
Streams for guitar

Flowers bloom for you
I wish I could get one
To place it under you hair
Let the butterfly come there

My mind full of nectar
Won’t spare a drop for the bee
Its all for you
But now its only me

Where are you
In the dark or in the light
It’s so cold and lonely here
You are a part of me!

When I walk by sea
Waves ask for you
I tell them a lie
That you are away

But I know you are gone
Never to be back
Will I ever could sing
That song you always loved

The Lone Flower

I met a flower,
Alone she was,
From the crowd,
At a cemetery.

I asked her
Scared are you not?
Then gushed a breeze
Its petals stooped.

Wondered what
Was she sobbing
Or was it divine
Or just a heightened feeling?

She then looked at me
It bloomed at me
Invited her friend passing by
A beautiful butterfly!

Together they sang,
A song of joy,
I wondered why
At a scary cemetery!

With a petal
She patted a bud
Dripped nectar for its pal
And then she asked me

Scared are you
’cause you are alive
Worried are you ,cause
You know not when you die

I took pale
Strange! I thought
True but scary
The cemetery

Alive am I ,but
When I die
Its going to be scary
To be in this cemetery

Courage I gained
Asked her a wit
Will you grow on me
When I say goodbye

The flower then cried
Drooped its petals
Withered herself
And fell dead.

A Prelude for ‘Seemaa’

I met the morning fog
It said she saw your eyes

Dew drops told me
Tears they are

Sorrow behind every word
Like the prelude of the morning rain

Is that your heart
In the just bloomed flower?

In your journey
Without a friend

Your sadness behind that smile
Tells me your loneliness

Dusks and dawns go unnoticed
Still they wait, to hear you say Yes!

Hey! What’s that your lip just whispered
Like the flame of a just lit candle?

Give me a promise today
In this night without stars

You will stop the time
And you remain forever…

Is this love?

I found a Genie
In a world without bounds
Which you can’t sense
But interact.

Then I met a flower
Just blossomed
Bathed in dew
And in fragrance.

She smiled and
Called me… hey stranger
I laughed and asked
Am I in love?

The tender petals
Shed a drop of dew
I felt the chill
Right in my heart.

Music of the bee
With rhythm of the breeze
She asked me
Are you in love?

I glimpsed the sky
The Sun shined
Its rays nurturing
My little flower.

I wanted a beer
But I won’t need it again
I am already in a trance
Is this love?

My little flower
Looked at me again
And said, pluck me
But tenderly…

My eyes widened
I am not for you
But for the one
You love…

My last rite

I see no saviour
No God to hear me
No happiness and
No sadness

In this dark night
I have no one to call mine
No shoulder to lean
No hands to hold

So lonely I am
Like the last flame
Of the dying candle
Giving its last light

No fingers to caress
Or to wipe these tears
To touch me
And say I am there

Allow me to close my eyes
Forever freeing myself
Let these silent tears
Dry and shriek

Let me dance
The last rite, but,
Where is your hand
For me to hold

Orphaned forever
In the lap of luxury
Stinking with money
To feel life’s deceit

Where is she
The angel of death
As time drags itself
To take me forever

Blood on the key board

Strange is this space
A new vision, a new hope
In a new horizon
A new world after all!

Estranged form bliss,
Let me confine,
In this intoxication,
Of these programmed feelings.

Fingers to press gently,
Shh! no noise please!
It will awake reality and,
Throw me to the deepest sea.

Let me play this game,
I know its pain, but,
When I touch these keys,
Am I goin’ insane?

Senses rule my beliefs,
I may not be right,
But where can I unmask,
My untold agonies.

Truth is so painful,
Let me undock it,
Leave it untouched,
For a new beginning.

Hey cyber genie,
Touch me now,
Feel me and trust me,
I am real in this virtuality.

I know you cannot,
You are a genie with magic,
But alas! You have a master,
You can send only an e-kiss.

Your e-hugs makes me weep,
Your e-kisses taste strawberry,
e-fingers caressing me,
‘Coz, I am your e-lover.

Look at me, here I’m,
Entrapped, helplessly,
Let me shriek,
l am in love with a genie!!

You will remain
Untouched, I know,
‘Coz its e-love,
You know that better.

I love this distance,
It makes me closer,
Though in virtual space,
But to you dear genie.

I may lose you someday,
I don’t know, but scared,
Let the e-virus relish,
My real blood on these keys…

The Count

Insane Lover

Keep that mirror for me in front of you
Look at those eyes the ones I carry in heart

You are my dawn, you are my dusk
You are my breaths, you are my world

Your words, your voice
So caring dipped in love

Can’t you see the pain in my heart
Can’t you feel the wounds in my mind

I see ways to reach you but my genie says ‘no’
Dissolving me in solitude abandoning me in silence

Lost in the trance of your beautiful eyes
Let me sleep in your arms

I await you at a crossing
I await my name to be called

Wish you call me my forgotten name
All night long till next dawn

Let me be your lips when you say my name
Let me be your tongue when you say I love you

Lift that masquerade let me see your face
The most elegant one, oh! celestial perfection

You said you’ll find me if I am lost
You’ll lick my tears if I weep

Tears have frozen, they refuse to bid
Farewell to me, you cannot wipe’em off

Let them remain, coz they are your memories
Cherished in my mind unerasable till I live

If its a crime to think about you
Punish me if you want let me accept

Allow me to walk till the end of life
Till I die in your lap

Let nobody be there with us
Only you, only me

You are my lady destined to be mine
But only in thoughts and in mind

God, I know you are a genie
I am only a stranger, an insane lover

You are so far away now, I cannot see you
Have you gone, back to your castle?

I wonder why am I here pressing these keys,
Writing your name again and again

Give me that potion of love and care
Let me relish it and bid farewell…

Just one word

Do you remember,
The dusk we were together,
We waited for something,
But it snowed.

So silent you were,
Like a bird lost,
In blue skies,
Searching for its nest.

You flew till the,
Sky became red,
For your nest,
Don’t you remember?

Let me try to recall,
That old love song,
I sang for you,
On those lonely dusks.

Why do you remain silent,
Like a breeze that won’t flow,
Like a spring without colours,
Like a rose without fragrance.

You loved those flowers,
But where did you disappear,
See the petals are heavy,
In the maiden dew.

Do not get lost,
Among those cruel thorns,
It will hurt your,
Tender fingers.

Hear, the unseen bird sings,
Again that same old love song,
I sang for you,
On those lonely dusks.

You are now a friend,
Of the dawn,
Of those bamboo flowers,
The rarest ones.

But you left,
Without even a goodbye,
The bloomed flower I brought,
Is still in my hand.

I still wait for you,
From dawn to dusk,
In sun and moon, just,
To hear you say-‘Goodbye’

For my dear Manoj and Babitha

I wake up everyday
To see your windows closed
No chyme to sing
No loud songs to relish

I look at that door
Every morning I leave
I know you aren’t there
But I betray myself

Your forgotten cd
In my shelf
The gift you gave
On my table

I look at them
As it were you
Hold them close to me
Just to feel you around

The cassettes with your name
Still play in my deck
The same old songs
I always loved to hear

I walk by the sea
Thinking about us
The good times we spent
In this cheerless place

The whisky I got
Invites me
But you aren’t there
So, its water to me

At times when lonely
I think about you
It reminds me our richness
In dialogues we shared

Feelings grow somehow
Anytime I see your snap
Days are longer now
Busy however they are

Another night awaits me
Let me look at that window
I know you aren’t there
Wondering why I miss you so much!

May I?

Let me light this lamp
In this darkest hour
Stormy and rainy
Without moon, without stars

Listen to me for a while
I have got thoughts a pile
Can’t keep it in this file
It needs to travel miles

I can’t see you
I can’t feel you
But our hearts are one
Can’t we walk together?

Look at these waves
They long to kiss your feet
Feel the sand underneath
Turning into flowers for you

I want to play another tune
Not that same old love song
But you are in these strings
So I know no other song

You are hidden in my thoughts
So the words are you, and,
I know no other melody
Other than your name

Are you lost in your shadow
Mourning silently?
Or are you lost in you, please
Let me hold your hands

You are like a droplet
On a leaf of a lotus
Shining like a pearl, but
Slipping away from me

So let me sing silently
Lost in your breaths
Deep in my heart
Holding you in my arms

Let me fill up your emptiness
And whisper in you
In this silent silence
That I’m yours

The flame of my lamp is tired
She will soon fall asleep
Only darkness will be left here
No shadows, no you and so no me.

Are you there?

Look at my eyes
They have a story to tell
But its silent
You need to feel

In my tears
Smiles of your memories
As if a rainbow
In a drizzle

Let me walk in this rain
Where I can hide
My tears along with water
As they fall down to earth

My breaths are like
This cool breeze
My life is like
This stream from hills

Will you get back my
Life filled with love
The one I lost in depths
Of this lonesome days

Give me the light
I need to move
In valleys where
I lost my way

The time will stop
The breeze will cease
The stream will dry
And I die

Debris

Don’t you know,
Its my last birthday.
Alone I am here,
With your memories.

Do I have a chance,
For she has left me,
Why have you bloomed,
To decorate no one.

She has reasons,
But I have only,
A season of rain
To hide my tears.

So, my little one
Let me pluck you!
To take you with me
Happiness awaits us.

I need a friend,
In my last journey
For I am drenched
In silence of sorrows.

Allow me to kiss you,
Before I kill you,
Let me wipe your dew,
As I shed my tears.

Scared aren’t you
Like a small child,
Away from its mother,
Sobbing and crying.

A time without end,
And no beginning
Is calling me now
To be in togetherness.

I have no one,
To say goodbye
No one to shed a tear,
Or someone for a last kiss.

Why are these clouds
So dark and scary,
But I am sure of my journey,
With you to the end.

You are pale today
With drooped petals,
Let me color you
Red with my blood.

Let me kiss you
One last time,
Before you say good bye
To your life.

Why do you say NO!
May be you are scared
To take that selfish plunge
To forget my sorrows.

Can’t you hear her laughs
Who nurtured you
For she’s happy
That I am alone!

Look!I am handsome today
No grey hairs
No more wrinkles and
In my best attire I am.

Read my mind
Its pure, yet dipped in
Love and potioned
With a spell.

Do you hate me
Am I not your friend
Your saviour
From life to eternity

Won’t you come with me
Oh beautiful one
For this time is mine
I have made it still

Let us say good bye
Taking that plunge
From that cliff
Down to death…

Recrimations

As I take this plunge
With my little flower, scared,
Still pale, even with
My blood on her, spilled

Death! I need it, I want it,
I will find it easy to breath
My heart will beat in rhythm
Love will be beautiful in there

Time coming to an end
With memories of you and me
The way to escape to freedom,
Saying good bye to me and you

My heart pounds, but why now!
Searching for air to breathe
Drenched in sweat, but why
Hey, am I getting scared?

Hello breeze, give me a sec
To ask him why he said ‘no’
To take me to my love
Across the seven seas

Can’t believe what he says
Asking for a chance again
At a time I had closed my eyes
To reach my end in eternity

Life is uncertain, he exclaims
Reminds me that my last journey
Won’t take me to her
But reach nowhere

‘Your beloved wept
As I left’ , he said
And a message that
She was on her way!

Hello loneliness, my best friend
I feel this chill, but why
‘Coward you are’ said she
‘Scared even to die!!’

Life so uncertain it is
As if a strayed fate
Helpless, but wishing to
Know its end, she proclaims

My dear little bird,
Silence your wings now
You never gave, but why,
My message to her

Lost my way, she says
Your lover, I could not find
Plunged you have, so,
Its late, time is up!

Let me ask my heart
You kept quiet, but why
He now calls me an idiot
For this plunge

Said he reminded me
Mirror, that’s life
I turned deaf, he says
When he begged to listen

Earth so near to me
Can I stop this journey now
Travelling to the beginning
Of the ultimate end

Am I late my beloved
I do not want to die now
You are yet to tell me
How you feel as I part

Wish I could wait a little more
A split second for a chance
One last try for everything back
At least to be lonely again

Let me ask my pale flower
And my bird and loneliness
My heart and mind why
Was I always the last to know?

You are a coward, they shout!
Never saw the snow when snowed
Scared to get wet when it rained
Never told what I needed

I am late, too late for now
No hopes, ‘coz I am a coward
Flame ends, a burnt candle I am

………………………..

This is an incomplete poem.
And it will remain incomplete till one day before I die…